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Cats bill of rights
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Cats bill of rights
Posted by
KitKat
(TD) 10 Aug 2012 6:44am
I am the cat, and I have certain inalienable rights:
I have the right to walk over your face anytime I wish, day or night.
I have the right to observe and comment on any and all bathroom behavior. Further, I have the right to be highly offended by any closed door.
I have the right to smell your shoes to determine if you have been fraternizing or cavorting or frolicking with any highly questionalbe animals.
I have the right to assist in any food preparation, cooking, cleaning or eating event that may occur in the home.
I have the right to wake you at three in the morning if I find my food dish is not to my satisfaction.
I have the right to tip over any water container I deem unsutiable for consumption.
I have the right to curse at squirrels and birds that may dare to pass my windows.
I have the right to inspect any grocery items that come into the home. Further, I have the right to inhabit any paper bag or cardboard box that you bring home for as long as I wish.
I have the right to nap at any time and place I darn well please, without distraction of being called or moved just because you want to sit down, wash your hands or use your computer keyboard.
I have the right to sleep on top of any appliance that is warm.
I have the right to assist in any changing of bed linens and to chase the phantom creatures that hide beneath the sheets.
I have the right to look aloof when scolded for mistaking your toes for one of those pesky phantom creatures that hide beneath the sheets.
I have the right to kill paper-towel rolls that otherwise might sneak up on you at night.
I have the right to your complete attention anytime you sit down to read or work.
And finally, I have the right to be loved, petted, pampered and entertained, for, as you know, the best things in life ........purr.
And, should you err in your ways, I will graciously forgive. After all, you are only human, but I love you anyway.
Signed,
The Cat
kittens
Posted by
shadetree17
13 Aug 2012 10:26pm
I also have the right to catch birds, mice, chipmunks or anything else and bring them to you alive and then let them go. I had a cat that did that alot
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